Even when I start off with an idea for a painting, paint has a mind of its own. It is as if, paint looks over at me and gives a little wink, saying, you might as well let go and enjoy the ride. Then without thought, a spontaneous gesture takes my brush and guides the paint into unchartered waters. My mind is gone and I'm thrown into the unknowable, the void takes me and my mind finally lets go.
Painting sometimes reminds me of the color orange. It is a hue that is avoided a lot of the time. To me, orange feels like a passionate spirit that wants to free you from your mind controlled chains, guiding you more into yourself.
This painting felt like an act of passion, the kind where your naked before your lover, honest, open, vulnerable. Then you realize what is happening and you want so bad to find your cloths, but your outer protection has been hidden away, no where to be found.
Then underneath the surface orange appears, silently ready to take you into forgotten caves of desire. Your mind can try to hold on, but drowning can be an uncomfortable death, so you might as well take off your cloths and dive into your infinite ocean.
When you can truly let go, then you can know the depth of your orange.
After returning from India, my energy has transformed. I can feel a love filling me, moving me, and inspiring me to be in this world without expectations. When I began this painting I could feel love moving the brush and paint in a new spontaneous form of unknowingness. I felt a tear fall down my cheek for this wonderful gift of love.
This painting was first a conceptional idea about the notion of perspective. As I worked with the basic form of the triangle, I felt the need to use bright and vibrant colors. Upon finishing this piece I realized that it was inspired from my upcoming visit to Indian.
The high energy and movement within this painting gives way to my inner excitement to connect with a part of the world that has lived dormant within my being.
Enjoy each brush stroke and receive this image with bliss filled joy.
I find that seeing is the way to transform our world into a meaningful existence. When I look, really look, at what is in front of me something new always appears.
I ask that when you look at my work take a moment, a minute, an hour to really see what is in front of you. You will be surprised at the way color and form can penetrate, mould, and move you into a spontaneous realization of the self. This self is not of thought, but of something outside of time and space. An energy that leads us down loves path to a richer and fuller existence.
Spirit always speaks through everything; a person, a rock, a lost prayer, and the food that I eat. I feel my life opening up and enveloping me in a new world. All I want is this moment, this breath, this sun falling below the earth. I am holding on and letting go all at the same time. My beloved speaks to me of how sacred I am. My voice is loud and clear and all I can do is follow love.
I let go of hate, of pushing, of aggression. I am a better person. A person who is free within my limitations. I am free and chained at the same time. I am alone and found at this moment that is always constantly actualizing my nature which has no realization, no future, and no potentiality.
A crow sits in a tree, at the very top, this was a moment ago, but my memory holds on.
He has been brought to me, so I can transform into whatever is coming. I am free because I no longer hold onto expectations. I am free because my chains no longer cloud my mind or hold me tight. I am free because I am no longer.
A butterfly came to me, so many showed their souls to me. I stand before you and need no explanation, no salvation, only acceptance.
You are my savior, you are my love, you are my soul. And I am free.
I've been reflecting on so much that my mind becomes bombarded with to many thoughts. My intention is to listen to what I'm saying within. This painting was a struggle between thought and matter. I turn within and leave the outer world behind.
I haven't written for a while as my feelings are causing me to take a new direction in life. I am beginning to embrace these changes within myself which in turn will affect what I create. I'm feeling doubts, fears, and insecurities about this process, but don't know how to translate these changes into my art.
I am interested in the unknown and unique characters of an object. The mystery of seeing and feeling your way through a painting or sculpture. I love the questions that bring about inspiration, insight, and transformation.
My process is about the conversation that is happening with the material. My experience is unique in each piece and the dialogue is always surprising. I find each brush stroke, each movement speaks to each other and a new conversation begins. I like to work without a symbolic idea attached. With this in mind, a new way of looking at the world is created. I feel that when we can look outside the box we let go of judgement and feel more freedom within our being.