Even when I start off with an idea for a painting, paint has a mind of its own. It is as if, paint looks over at me and gives a little wink, saying, you might as well let go and enjoy the ride. Then without thought, a spontaneous gesture takes my brush and guides the paint into unchartered waters. My mind is gone and I'm thrown into the unknowable, the void takes me and my mind finally lets go.
Painting sometimes reminds me of the color orange. It is a hue that is avoided a lot of the time. To me, orange feels like a passionate spirit that wants to free you from your mind controlled chains, guiding you more into yourself.
This painting felt like an act of passion, the kind where your naked before your lover, honest, open, vulnerable. Then you realize what is happening and you want so bad to find your cloths, but your outer protection has been hidden away, no where to be found.
Then underneath the surface orange appears, silently ready to take you into forgotten caves of desire. Your mind can try to hold on, but drowning can be an uncomfortable death, so you might as well take off your cloths and dive into your infinite ocean.
When you can truly let go, then you can know the depth of your orange.
After returning from India, my energy has transformed. I can feel a love filling me, moving me, and inspiring me to be in this world without expectations. When I began this painting I could feel love moving the brush and paint in a new spontaneous form of unknowingness. I felt a tear fall down my cheek for this wonderful gift of love.